Monday, June 9, 2008

Today, my friend Herb shared with me an anecdote about how he "one-upped" a man waiting for the elevator by not telling him that pressing the button more does not make the elevator come more quickly. I was astounded at this base cruelty in my friend, not remembering a time when he had engaged in such maliciousness. However, I then turned to thoughts of hope, and wondered if Herb's actions were not, in fact, for the greater good. The man he had "one-upped" obviously believed that pressing the button more would hasten the elevator's time of arrival, and if he had been robbed of that belief, he may have been grief-stricken and gone through the rest of the day in a period of advanced ennui. Then again, perhaps neither action really has any effect on this man, and in my mind I picture both Herb and his victim faceless objects, forever awaiting the elevator. I know this is not the case, as at this point and time, Herb has gone home and I lay restless on the cot of my own despair, but still I wonder if Herb's actions were for the greater good or a step into chaos.

On another note, I have still not received any sort of snail mail, e-mail, faxes, or text messages. I can only assume my house-mate Yolanda has burned all of my mail, or perhaps stolen it for we share a secret unspoken love. The e-mail has probably been destroyed by those who use their expertise in computers for nefarious deeds, though I cannot imagine to which end they would do this. I do not have a fax machine, which explains why I have no faxes, but I wonder if people are trying to fax me despite this. Should I purchase a fax machine so that I can receive all the faxes for me that potentially exist? I shall think on this. I can only blame the lack of text messages on myself, for my over-sized fingers cannot depress the buttons on the phone ably enough to send text messages of my own, and so people do not send me text messages. I have received one blog reply. After reading it several times, I replied to it. I can only hope that other blog replies come to alleviate the overwhelming ennui that comes from the monotony of my life.

I am going to see if Yolanda wants to attend that movie at the theater, the one starring that actor everyone is talking about. If she declines my offer, I shall invite Herb. I just hope he does not have me smuggle him into the theater inside my coat this time.

7 comments:

Gold-Digging Nanny said...

If it's that movie with that one actor who had some trouble with some substances, I would highly recommend it. If it's that other movie about that guy who looks for old things that are not quite natural in nature, I would have to say that it was not quite as good as the first three movies.

Jamaal said...

If I go with Yolanda, then it will most likely be neither of those films. She has been wanting to see that film about four women which was based on a cable television show.

If I end up going with Herb, then I will take your recommendations into consideration.

Rotten Arsenal said...

Jamaal,

Perhaps you should point out to your diminutive compatriot that while the impatient gentleman might well have fixated his less than extraordinary brain power on pushing a button repeatedly to no extra benefit, this is no more of a pointless and self-serving endeavor than standing there watching said gentleman and smugly carrying on an internal dialog about how absurd it is to focus on something so trivial.

Jovially yours,

Rotten

Jamaal said...

Very true. I shall think on this, and perhaps I shall bring this up to him the next time I see him.

Norm Loman said...

Jamaal, if you are planning on purchasing a fax machine, I highly recommend that brand that everyone likes. It does a great job of fulfilling it's function as a communication medium. It outperforms the other popular brands by a significant percentage, in terms of overall efficiency.

Jamaal said...

Would I be able to purchase it at that popular electronics store, or would I have to order it from the manufacturer?

Rotten Arsenal said...

Perhaps you can find one that is discounted during the upcoming sale that celebrates the holiday...